Love and Marriage: Belittling and Henpecking

“She openeth her mouth with wisdom;
and in her tongue is the law of kindness.”
Proverbs 31:26

Am I My Husband’s Teacher?
I respond with resentment and irritation whenever my grown children speak to me as though I were their child. Why?  My thoughts go something like this, “Don’t they know who I am?  I’m the mom.  It’s not respecting my position when they try to tell me what to do, or speak to me in that condescending way as though I were a small child!”

Where do they get that from, anyway??  Well, I don’t have to look too far for an illustration from my own life, of where they get that from.  How often do I, as a wife, try to “teach” my husband some very simple, and “obvious” lesson, using dripping sarcasm, a rebuke, a putdown, or a tone I would reserve for a five-year-old?  How often, indeed? Chastened, chagrined, I purpose in my heart, while asking forgiveness and help from the Lord, to speak less, and when I do speak, to let God teach my husband, and not me.

Silence Is Golden? May Be!
There is an excellent article, though convicting, which relates to my comments above, entitled, “Warning Signs That You’re Talking Too Much,” (link no longer available) from Exemplify Online magazine.

Do you know what “henpecking” is?  You may not be able to define it, but you’ve seen it.  Here is an article found in a secular newspaper, by Dan Howe, in his column called “Here’s Howe” on the subject of henpecking, which every wife would do well to read.  (Lord, deliver us from ever henpecking our husbands.)
“In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin:
but he that refraineth his lips is wise.”
Proverbs 10:19
“There is that speaketh like the piercings of a sword:
but the tongue of the wise is health.”
Proverbs 12:18

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9 Replies to “Love and Marriage: Belittling and Henpecking”

  1. Heather,
    I haven't gotten any plate groupings done, but thanks for reminding me of that idea! I did have a wonderful “dishes” experience today! I went to a friend's garage sale and I am so excited because I found a complete 12-piece set of beautiful old china, with a small floral print, very pretty, in great condition, only one little chip on one little plate that I can see, and all the serving pieces: platter, 2 oval bowls, gravy boat, cream and sugar, etc., for 25 dollars! I love them! I am kind of obsessed with dishes, and I have a lot of large groups here for dinner, and such, and since changing my colors from blue to green, I haven't had dishes enough to set a table for 12, except my very fancy china, which is very formal. These dishes will be less formal, and can be combined with my other green dishes when I have more people, I think. I'm so happy I found them and can't believe the price.
    Again, thanks for the great plate grouping idea!
    Blessings,
    Wendy

  2. Nancie,
    You're such a blessing, and your words are always an encouragement to me. Yes, the Lord is the Best Teacher. Sometimes He uses people as His tools, usually when they don't know it! I hope you're having a wonderful week.
    Love ya,
    Wendy

  3. covnitkepr1,
    So glad you found me, and I look forward to coming over for a visit! Thanks for the kind words. I hope you continue to come and find good things to think on and apply in your life.
    Blessings,
    Wendy

  4. Hi Wendy,

    This is a great post! It's so important to remember how best to relate to our loved ones in ways that will encourage them and help them to grow in the Lord. The Lord is their best teachers. May God continue to bless you and your family as you seek and serve Him together. Take care and have a lovely week!

    Warm regards,
    Nancie

  5. Great blog…nice posts.
    I’ve enjoyed looking over your blog. I came across it through another blog I follow, and I’m glad I did. I am now a follower of yours as well. Feel free to look over my blog and perhaps become one as well.

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