Making Your Home A Refuge

Linking up today with the Homemaking Linkup. Go to Raising Homemakers to participate and read other hearts share on the subject of Homemaking.

In a recent comment I received, our homes were referred to as a “refuge.”  This is a warm and rich word picture to me.  The world truly can beat you up. The storms may be howling without, winds assaulting, cold and harsh.  As a homemaker you can make your home that one place in the world where it is safe, and your husband and children know that they are loved.  Making your home a haven, a refuge, is a ministry.  I don’t feel that I do this very well sometimes.  Satan is plotting against it.  Busyness thwarts it.  Your sin natures make it very difficult.  The strife you feel is the antithesis of the peaceful environment that you’re seeking.
Have well-meaning family and friends spoken to you about their concerns that your children, because they’re Homeschooled, won’t learn how to get along with people and know how to interact in society, because they’re not “out in the world”?  (Some call it the “real world.”)  Tell me, where is it the most difficult to get along with others?  In my experience, it’s in our own homes with our own families who know us best!  I believe that if we can get along and have peace in our own family, in our own home, we can get along anywhere.  And that peace is a huge testimony to the world of the power of God’s love.





I heard this phrase when my children were young: “Your children should be each other’s best friends,” and I immediately latched on to it.  I’m not even sure how old they were, because the phrase was something we’d been practicing and trying to do from the time our children were born.  The phrase resonated in our hearts and minds, though, and helped us put into words what we were feeling.  We wanted our children’s closest relationships to be among their own family.  We didn’t want our children’s hearts to be turned to friends, and prefer to be with them.  We wanted “the hearts of the children to be turned to their father.” (Malachi 4:6)  And to each other.

We didn’t want our children to be peer dependent.  We knew they would be peer influenced, so we tried to follow the Bible’s admonition to walk with the wise and be a companion of the wise, and not a companion of fools (who’ll be destroyed).  And we tried to raise children who weren’t fools, and bad influences on others, either.  An older, wiser mom used to say, however, that, “Children are born ‘silly fools.'”  (You have to train the foolishness out of them:)

He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed.  Proverbs 13:20

That is why I find such joy when my children act wisely and knowing that they love each other.  They always choose to include each other, love to be together and treat each other lovingly almost without exception.  They truly are each other’s best friends.


By the Grace of my Heavenly Father alone, through His Son, Jesus Christ.

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8 Replies to “Making Your Home A Refuge”

  1. Hi, Amber–good to meet you:) Sounds like you’re doing a good job. Keep on with them, and you’re so right, it takes “lots of prayers”!

  2. Just found this through the Raising Homemakers link up! Such a great post. I’m actually due in March with our first born (*cue happy dance*) and my husband and I know that we want to raise a Godly and close family. Thanks for this reminder about children being each other’s best friends! I pray that our children will be this way, and the closest people in their lives will be our family!

    1. Congratulations, Felicia!! How exciting. March is a lovely time to have a baby:) What a joy to start out with your family with Godly goals. We spoke the “fact” to our children that they should be each other’s best friends, we did everything together, many, many intentional things, but God’s grace, and His Spirit made it happen–praise the Lord. A close family is something so precious–but it doesn’t mean that we don’t have our moments of not getting along:)
      Thanks so much for your comment!

  3. Hi Wendy. Just found your blog through the Raising Homemaker’s link-up. I really enjoyed this post. This is what my husband and I want for our children. We want them to be close and to grow up to be best friends and look out for one another. Somedays, though, it seems that they fight and tattle more than get along, and this can be very frustrating for us as parents. So we are using some godly resources and, of course, the Word to do as God instructs us in raising children. And lots of prayers. Thanks for this post.

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